Me and the Battled with God

a writing by RENELLE R. TONGE

There was a time; long ago, lived a child who loved her father and believed with all her might that if she kept right all her starry dream would come true. This child lived in a world were fair wasn't just right and wrongs were committed almost every night. In these trying time her faith did she not faulter, for when things went bad her turn to her father, One day this child facing devastation threw her hands up and looked to the heavens and called an upon a god, her father as so mighty, to save her from the pain, she was about 11 years old... and a confused scared and depressed lonely soul who would sit in her room on her window ceil and no matter what time of the day it was, she feels the weight of her world crush and crash in on her, still she glowed dim, low on hope as she took to the skies, most times the moon and the stars that shone ever so bright sending light wave of hope from million and billion of light years away couldn't reach our poor little child who sat on that by window ceil wishing desperately to become one of those bright beautiful transcendent glowing ball of hot cosmic fire and dust that always seem to float around the earth so happy and content and proud of being a supernova burning billions of mile while being admire and adore by all who looked up and gazed loving at the dim bright glows of it light wave hitting the earth at night ... and as the child sat there; there was darkness in her soul and it was looking for something sad inside her pulling and tuging, so her god reach out to pull her out and make her whole, she stared up at those stars and would ask the heavenly father for mercy; to make her a star to bathe her in his grace, to fill her with everlasting joy, that she could once again become one a big hot ball of cosmic fire and dust a supernova in his and all eyes, to make she into something...special, so that whatever problems she had, she could face it with him by her side and with the power of all his strength and knowledge.

Every day she sat and she prayed and she sat and she prayed for him to come and take her away. she sat by that her window and she prayed. Then she prayed some more... No answer came, so she cried so alone in her world, she fell deprived. Oh, how she felt like her prayers would never come true, but still, she prayed hopefully that one day it would burn true. but yet the holly one never answered; not one single pray... She fell to her knee and cried, as she hit the ground battered and bruise, mind unbounded by the acts against her, made by the sins of people so untrue, their wicked ways claimed her, they eyes cocked and aimed at her...like a loaded heavy two barrel gun, but still her holy one, he showed no her no mercy... so she danced his praise night and day. She danced until she could dance no more nor could she felt her feet, but she pressed on, never giving up, never slowing down, singing his praises. For he was the lord almighty and almighty he was named, yet that was at last no use, as she fell from exhaustion... she threw her head UP and she did the most common thing she could do, she asked the Lord Why? Why haven't you answered me?... she asked but there was no answer so she asked again and again still she heard NOTHING but SILENCE... Heartbroken she fell into despair. Why oh lord have you forsaking me? she screamed, feeling like there could never be any mercy, and NO show of his grace, just her and her pain, her darkness, her sins, her woos and most of all cries growing dim and out of light; to a holy heavenly GOD that under no circumstances would ever answer her dark and shallow cries. The End!

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