At Fathers Bedside

a writing by Adeosun Olamide Ayo

It begins at dinner, you tell her the food is spicy and then she speaks back- and say “But yesterday- you told that I add a little spice”- just keep quiet, she is trying to tell you- she has a better memory than you- abandon the food and walk away- now- she will be more commanding- she will begin to command answers, ask you questions- like she is your commander or even pull you back- or hold your hands to hold you back- feel!- She is trying to use her nails to hurt you- this is the moment where you must be careful- don’t hit her, just push her to the wall and walk away and when the next morning come- surprisingly you will be asked how she came about bandage on her head- yes I know it was just a little push- know she is trying to create an impression, to make people think you a villain- don’t bother showing anyone your plastered wrist- where her claws ripped- calm down- women are like that- exaggerating and trying to be the victim.

You don’t know, do you? That when she greets you- she is commanding you to greet her, playing the power tussle- leading the conversation, an impress upon you- she is more thoughtful.

See, when your wife greets you, stare her in the face- and ask her this “Are you trying to command me to talk, to show you are more thoughtful?), if she looks back at you, increase your voice rapidly- most women now would have raised voice or come hysterical- making jest of you- she is thinking you as the folly one- but if she is silent- it is worse- calmly ask her- who she is been defiant with and why she is ignoring your question- and if she screams “No!” she is speaking back at you then, screaming- and trying to ignite a fight or your anger- tell her she has failed- on knowing she has failed’ she will come suddenly sad- and just pitiable- if you register her heart beat- she is praying for a guest to come in and see her in that state- ask her why she is trying to ruin your relationship with others, ask her why she wants the next guest to see her in such sympathetic dire manner- like you have hit her, why she is trying to create a bad image for you, why she has caused the neighbors to see you as irresponsible? And then just walk out- she touching you or pulling you back at this moment is more than it seems- raise your voice a little again and tell her- you can’t let her hit you- but if she is silent and all she says is sorry- she is trying to show you- she is more matured than you and that you- are but naive- walk out, don’t let the deserved anger control your fist.

And when she wakes you up- to have a talk- - now you must understand- she is trying to make a hell of your life, trying to deplete your work rate- but you really have to be careful here- begin by letting her know the truth, how having a nightmare is paradise to her presence- be more direct- yet respectful- ask her if she wants you to slumber at work the next day- look like a fool- or when you are driving to work- if she wants you to have an accident- let her know you are considering not coming home- Then she says O.K. and start to sob silently- you must act your role now- hold her and ask her what is wrong, why she is crying- ask her if it is because you realized her attempt to make you have an accident the coming morning, tell her to be happy- that she is the fire burning in your hell already.

The next morning, her face is swollen- you have an understanding already, a why- she is trying to get everyone to hate you- just hug her and say you are sorry, sometimes begging her would save you a lot- she might kill herself and pin the murder on you- before you are back from work, she is a woman- they are capable of many crazy things.

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