Dying Flame

a poem by Nadezhda Aleksandrovna Montik, USA - poetry writer, author, poet

It was an enormous fire burning
inside of me for Jesus and
it made me feel so safe and
so happy and I was filled with love.

I cross her off my list and a glance at the
worn page shows me that there is not a lot
of people left for me to trust and the mean remarks
of the crossed out names sting me again.

It’s only a flame now but it’s still burning
within me though it is not as bright and
it still shows me forgiveness and can
make me smile through my storm of tears.

I cannot cry and there is no way I can just
withdraw and stop talking and laughing and
being myself because to let them know how much
they are hurting me is to give them power over me.

It’s been extinguished onto a spark by the hate
and everything inside me is charred black
and the light from the spark is so dim and I can’t see
and I no longer feel the warmth.

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