I and Me

a poem by Sujatha Thankeswaran Parvathy, India

Every day I lived,
All time I lived,

As a child of somebody,
As a sibling of somebody,
As a disciple of somebody,
As a partner of somebody,
As a parent of somebody,
As a colleague of somebody,
As a relation of somebody, distant or close,

Connected by the mesh of relations,
Just borne out of existence as a being, as a life form…
Breathing, sensing, and tossed up at times by a medley of emotions.

Am given a body, a name and relations borne,
To a group of people
By choice or by chance,
At will, by wish or just destiny.

A group of strangers connected by lineage?
A group of strangers living nearby?
A group of strangers sharing the work space?
A group of strangers travelling together in the journey of the ephemeral life…

I knew theirs and they knew my existence.
Alas! I do not know them, they do not know me.
I do not recognise them, nor do they realise me.
I do not belong to them nor do they belong to me.

I lived in their space, they lived in my space.
They were all the time in my space, in my thoughts, but not me.
All the time I lived, in those spaces in my thoughts, occupied by them.
I thought about them, related me with them,
Still I did not know them, they did not know me.

I did not know me, for I was them
Many a tags I carried, to identify myself
I didn’t have an identity
But then Who am I? What am I and my identity?

Shedding the tags, shedding the chain of belonging,
Borne to this world alone, to return to my abode alone.
The journey is not as a daughter nor a son,
Not as a sibling, Nor a spouse,
Not as a friend nor an enemy,
,
Bundles of lives young and old, bundles of experiences good and bad,
Living being borne to this world
Engrossed in their lives, their world, so am I.
I was me, I am me, I will be me !!!

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