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Two Poems from our Funny Poetry Collection

 
 
Revenge on Santa
   
Author: Robert Miller
   
Poem:
Revenge on Santa
   
  You thought you were slick
jolly St. Nick
last year when you left coal for me,
but i'm ahead of you
and all that you do
just wait and you will see.

With you on the way
and your reindeer pulling sleigh
i went to my rooftop and removed the snow,
i dumped piles of sand
so you could'nt land
and would have no place to go.

And if you somehow found a way
that is okay
because there is more in store for you,
like when you start to shimmey down
the chimmney you found
and there's flames just shooting through.

If for some reason you last
and make it past
booby trap #2,
just like before
there will be more in store
in cookies i left for you.

Eat them for me
and you will soon see
the rest of your journey on a porclian seat,
then maybe you'll think twice
of who's naught or nice
and not leave coal as christmas treat.
   
  More Funny poems
 
 
DIALOGUE, OR DIRE LOGIC?
   
Author: Lee Emmett
   
Poem: DIALOGUE, OR DIRE LOGIC?
   

what are you doing now?
waiting for a friend

who is this friend?
I’ll know at the day’s end

what are you going to do next?
walk along a path

where will the path take you?
I’ll tell you as I tread along

why are you singing a song?
I’ll let you know when I stop

when are you going to do that?
when the story has been told

who is the story about?
I’ll give you a clue if you listen

will I be able to tell?
that depends if you know yourself

how will I know myself?
just ask yourself a question

which question will I ask?
that’s up to you to decide

will you be my friend?
ask me at the end of the day

can I walk along the path with you?
if you join in this song and play
 
More Funny poems

 

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