I LAUGHED SO HARD I ALMOST PEED MY PANTS
WHEN HE GOT UP TO DO HIS LITTLE DANCE

BLACK VELVET PLAYED IN THE BACKGROUND
HE STOOD UP TO SHAKE IT BUT THEN HE FELL DOWN

I HONESTLY WANTED TO HELP HIM UP
HE LOOKED JUST LIKE A SAD LITTLE PUP BUT

HE WAS SO WASTED AND I JUST COULDN'T HELP
HE JUST LAUGHED IT OFF THEN HE GOT UP HIMSELF

I LAUGHED EVEN HARDER WHEN HE STRUTTED BY
SHAKING HIS BUTT WITH A TWINKLE IN HIS EYE

NOW I MUST SAY THAT'S ONE HECK OF A GUY
THAT CAN MAKE ME LAUGH UNTIL I CRY